How to give yourself the self-care you don’t think deserve

Yup I said what you are probably thinking… I don’t deserve self-care. I know I have said it multiple times. I dont know when we as women decided that we have to EARN the right to take care of ourselves, but we did and now it’s a battle every time we even think about it.

Self-care is hard. Because in my own head, if I care about myself, then someone else is not being cared for, or I consider myself selfish. You’re probably nodding your head like I am right now, yup I’m selfish for wanting to do something nice for myself.

Grrr… doesn’t that make you mad? Like if one of your friends said to you, I need a massage, your response isn’t, “OMG you are so selfish!!!’ No freaking way… you would be in complete support of it AND you would probably even follow up that support with a “I need one of those, too!”


So self-care, how do we give it, without feeling guilty?

Here are my top 3 tips…

1. Start small. One thing I promised myself is a pedicure. Yup an inexpensive pedicure once of month. Can I afford the $12, yup. I spend more on Starbucks on a weekly basis so I can afford to give up one drink a week ($3 drink) for a monthly pedicure. When I go, I highly recommend doing nothing. Absolutely nothing while you sit in the chair. Put your phone away and close your eyes.

2. Find a free hobby. Nothing in life these days seem free but believe it or not, walking through the neighborhood or better yet, the water is still free! Get out there and take 30 minutes once a week to spend time with yourself. There are times I will literally go to the beach or bay and sit in my car just staring off into the water. Go for a hike is another option. Being in nature is such an amazing opportunity to give yourself a moment to breathe.

3. Quiet time. This is a golden nugget if I say so myself. Taking time to sit with yourself to journal, read or sit in silence. I cannot not tell you how much I value the silence of an early morning while the world is asleep. I usually take the first 15 minutes of my day to spend thinking about MY goals and MY day. And yes friends, it may require you to get up a little bit earlier but it’s worth it! Try it for one week.

I know these aren’t rocket science but taking some time for yourself doesn’t mean you have to do something as big as a 90-minute massage. Although those are great, it’s often times the little things that we treat as the BIG things that will move us forward into the direction where we are happiest. And lets face it, if we’re not happy, our households aren’t happy either.

Take the time for yourself. No one is going to hand it over to you. So it may take some getting used to. But I kid you not, the result of giving yourself some space to breathe will be a benefit for everyone.